Author: Mary Doube

Strong Coach Mary

When women embark on the transformative journey of perimenopause and menopause, it's important to acknowledge the unique challenges we may face in our sexual life.

The burning question is… (insert drum roll) Is My Sex Life Over?
Menopause does not equal an end to your sex life. Hell No! Intimacy, pleasure, and sex are not just for the young. Nothing could be further from the truth. In this blog, we will explore the impact of perimenopause and menopause on libido & sexual health and offer advice to support women during this significant time in their lives.

Understanding Perimenopause and Menopause

Perimenopause and menopause represent a natural transition in a woman's life. Perimenopause refers to the period leading up to menopause when the ovaries gradually produce less Estrogen. Menopause, on the other hand, is marked by the absence of menstrual periods for 12 consecutive months. These hormonal shifts bring about physical and emotional changes that can influence various aspects of a woman's life, including her sexual well-being. These changes can catch us TOTALLY off guard.  Dryness, itching, and burning down there (not to mention painful sex!) are just a few of the uncomfortable symptoms that can happen not to mention the impact on your overall libido confidence, vitality, and pleasure as a woman–all things that you deserve to have!

What we hear A-LOT!

Here are our 3 most common issues:

  • Where did my MOJO go? Many women experience changes in their sexual desire during perimenopause and menopause. The variations in hormone levels, particularly reduced Estrogen, can contribute to a decrease in libido. Additionally, factors such as stress, body image concerns, and relationship dynamics can influence sexual desire and contribute to the complexities of this journey.
  • DRY VA-JAY-JAY: Declining Estrogen levels can lead to vaginal dryness, causing discomfort or pain during sexual activity. Thinning and less elastic vaginal tissues can result in irritation or tearing, affecting a woman's sexual satisfaction and overall well-being.
  • The BIG “O”: Menopause can impact a woman's sexual response cycle, including arousal, orgasm, and overall sexual satisfaction. Achieving orgasm may become more challenging, and the intensity of the sensation may decrease. These changes can be disorienting, but new avenues of pleasure can be explored with compassion and patience.

    What can you Do?

    Our 5 best tips for bringing the sizzle back:

    1. GET ZEN WITH YO’ SELF: Recognise these changes are a natural part of your journey. Be kind to yourself and allow space for self-compassion. Embrace the changes and remember that your worth and desirability extend far beyond your physical experiences.

    2. JUST BE HONEST: Engage in honest and compassionate conversations with your partner about your experiences, concerns, and desires. Establish a safe space where both of you can express yourselves openly, fostering a deeper connection and understanding.

    3. DON’T SUFFER, GET HELP: Seek the support of healthcare professionals specialising in menopause or sexual medicine. They can provide personalised advice, recommend treatment options, and offer guidance on enhancing your sexual well-being.  If you are troubled by a persistent or recurrent lack of desire, you are likely to have what has been described as "hypoactive sexual desire disorder," the most common sexual complaint among women.

    4. THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX: Explore alternative forms of intimacy that foster emotional and physical closeness with your partner. Focus on activities such as sensual massages, prolonged foreplay, cuddling, and shared moments of connection. Intimacy encompasses a broad spectrum and can bring joy and fulfilment outside of penetrative sex. 

    5. GET YOUR SEXY ON: Prioritise self-care activities that promote your overall well-being. Exercise regularly, eat a balanced diet, and practice relaxation techniques like meditation or Breath exercises or go buy yourself a new set of SEXY underwear! Taking care of your physical and mental health can positively influence your sexual vitality & libido.


    During perimenopause and menopause, it's essential to approach the topic of sexual health with empathy, compassion, and understanding. Embracing your unique journey and communicating openly with your partner can foster a sense of connection and intimacy. Remember, this is a time for self-discovery and growth, and with self-compassion, professional support, and a willingness to get to a healthier you, this stage of life can be improved.

    Your biggest sex organ is your mind and there is no limit to the erotic imagination so why not flick the switch through Menopause.

    Time to be Keeping Your ‘Sexy Pilot Light’ On I say Ladies!


    Author: Mary Doube (Strong Coach Mary)

    Founder & Director


    You might also like to read: Emotional Eating During Menopause.

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